We go again

If you're unhappy with how you look and feel after the year from hell, you're not alone.

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The pandemic impacted basically every aspect of our lives. It was inescapable. For me, the area it made the biggest impact was on my physical health, and I know I’m far from alone in this regard. Exercising became much harder to do basically overnight. Gyms across the country shut down, and for months people were even unsure about exercising outside (even though this was eventually shown to be very safe). I, like many other people, had virtually no home exercise equipment, so once the situation really got serious, I was left with basically no outlet for physical activity.

Compound this with quarantine culinary adventures and the stress eating that comes along with having another baby and several other personal issues, and you won’t be surprised to learn that I’m tipping the scales significantly higher than I was one year ago. And I’m not the only one.

Professor Fritz Robocop @ZeppoWilbury

I don’t think it’s controversial to say American culture has an unhealthy relationship with weight. I’m not here to shame anyone. There are lots of different body types, and as long as people are comfortable with themselves I don’t think they should feel pressured to look different. But my situation is not that, because I feel awful.

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In early 2008, I aggravated an existing back injury and found myself in a very bad place. At one point, it was so bad that the only way I could get out of bed was to roll onto the floor and drag myself up by grabbing onto the windowsill, all while in excruciating pain. I herniated a disc in my lower back, and I was out of work for a month while getting injections and basically leaving my bed only to eat and use the bathroom. And during this month of extreme inactivity and emotional binge eating, I gained about 30 pounds.

My back issues eventually went away, but the weight has stayed with me ever since. No matter what I tried, I was never able to lose more than a couple pounds without immediately gaining it back. I even developed a halfway decent gym habit, but the numbers never moved the way I wanted them to. And then in the fall of 2019, I finally got fed up and made changes.

I didn’t reinvent the wheel, but I did enough that the pounds finally started to fall off and stay off. I cut out snacking (a huge problem for me), committed to eating more salads and vegetables, and tried to limit drinking to the weekends. And after seven months, I was down over 20 pounds and tantalizingly close to my college weight. That was April, 2020, and over the last year, that number slowly ticked back up until last month, I stood on the scale and saw the same number as when I started.

Needless to say, this was utterly demoralizing. My one successful attempt at losing weight after a decade of trying was gone, like it never even happened.

This time, though, I’m not going to wait a decade before I try to get myself back to where I want to be. And while this is clearly not a situation I wanted to find myself in again, this time I’m armed with the knowledge that I can do it, and I know how. I’m reinstituting some discipline when it comes to mid-afternoon and late night snacks, and trying to be more conscientious about the things I put into my body. The big adjustment this time will be exercising. Even if I felt good about going to the gym, trying to find the time with two kids under three at home is a real challenge. To help with this, I’ve assembled an incredibly threadbare gym in my basement. It’s not the same, but it helps me eliminate a major excuse for not working out since there’s no commute and I can be done in under 20 minutes. And now that the weather is nicer I can always go for a walk, run, or bike ride. I’m making do, but diet is going to be more important than ever. It sucks!

I’ve never been a particularly patient person. If I’m not good at something right away or don’t see immediate progress, there’s a good chance I’m going to walk away from it. But I know this is a long game, and I’m not going to be successful unless I chip away, slowly and steadily.

We made this Basque chicken recipe for dinner last night, and I think it does a great job of being generally pretty healthy but also satisfying. I’m usually wary of spiralizer recipes, but this is a very good one. Just make sure you bump up the seasoning levels substantially (the recipe calls for 1/4 teaspoon of paprika, and I used 2 teaspoons, for example). If you have any health-conscious recipes you think actually taste good and don’t leave you feeling hungry right away, I would love it if you shared them in the comments below. We’re in this together, team.

Now, in the name of fairness, here’s the Buffalo chicken Detroit style pizza we made over the weekend. Balance in all things, you know.